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Tue, Oct. 21st, 2008, 11:37 am
biopsy today
My long-awaited biopsy will take place today at 4:30pm. Barring anything unexpected, I get to go free from the hospital tomorrow morning. Which is good, because I've developed a pretty acute case of cabin fever, which is exacerbated not only by how long I've been in here (since Thursday night), but also by how much I miss my family. I'm so lucky to have my Goddess Katie, and my Little Lord Michael. They are the best things that have ever happened to me, and I look forward to being the healthy husband and father they deserve.
And for those of you who are thinking "Whaaat? He's in the hospital right now??":
I've had a recurring infection in my face for a few years now. It finally got diagnosed during a flare-up at the end of May 2008. A CT scan showed that I had a little 3cm tumor resting on top of my upper right jawbone. The doctor emphasized that at that point 'tumor' was just a word for an abnormal collection of cells. He said that for this particular type of thing, it wasn't even possible for it to be cancerous. It hadn't done any damage yet, but it was basically impossible to know what exactly it was without getting a piece of it out. So rather than do 2 surgeries, a plan was made for an oral surgeon to excise the whole thing and further analyze it afterward. However, due to financial and insurance issues, that never happened. I did get antibiotics for it, and after following that prescription, everything went back to normal (as had happened for the previous 5-6 occurrences over the past 3-4 years).
Fast forward to last week. Another flare up. I was at work when it started to get painful, which is my 'normal' sign that it's time to go to the emergency room, get it drained, and get some antibiotics. Plus I had been working at my new awesome job at JumpTV for nearly 3 months, which put me on the cusp of having the insurance in place that would allow me to take care of this thing properly. I finished my shift at regular time, and drove myself to the emergency room for another 'routine' draining and prescription.
What happened when I arrived at the hospital was anything but 'routine'. Almost immediately everyone started treating me with an urgency and graveness of tone that I'd not seen before. The doctor I saw seemed flabbergasted that I had allowed this thing to languish for 5 months, and he more or less demanded I have another CT scan. So I did, and it showed my tumor grew 1 whole cm since May. Which is quite a lot for a foreign object inside one's face. It is pushing on my jawbone, and getting dangerously close to my sinuses, teeth, and even my brain. However it has not affected any of those in a detectable way so far, so the determination to do something about this ASAP was pretty much a no-brainer (no pun intended).
So I've been in the hospital, taking massive amounts of intravenous antibiotics to hopefully clear up any infections that are contributing to my face problems. It's been a pretty painful experience too, and I certainly ingested my share of painkillers over the last five days. I've seen a cavalcade of specialists, and none of them can really tell me what I have. Best guess: they think I may have a maxillary ameloblastoma. But thankfully, the ball will really get rolling today, and after today's biopsy I might actually get to finally find out what this thing in my face is. And beat it down.
It's now 11:30. 5 hours til biopsy time. I think I'm going to try to sleep through most of that time. And of course I'll update you when there's more to know...
Send me your prayers and positive energies! I'll be well again soon.
this is what i listened to at work yesterday. *Artist Name *Album Title *Song Title Radiohead Amnesiac Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box Sunny Day Real Estate The Rising Tide The Rising Tide Pedro The Lion The Only Reason I Feel Secure I Am Always The One Who Calls Queens Of The Stone Age Queens of the Stone Age - Rated R The Lost Art Of Keeping A Secret Ulrich Schnauss Far Away Trains Passing By Between Us And Them Yeah Yeah Yeahs Fever To Tell (Explicit) Y Control Pearl Jam Yield Brain Of J The Appleseed Cast Mare Vitalis Mare Mortis Slint Tweez Charlotte Les Savy Fav Go Forth Pills At The Drive-In This Station Is Non-Operational Metronome Athritis Dustin O'Halloran Piano Solos, Vol. 2 Opus 20 Menomena I Am the Fun Blame Monster E. Is Stable Bjork Family Tree Joga (Strings And Vocals) Chris Martin Mayor Of The Sunset Strip: Original Soundtrack To The Motion Picture Yellow (Live) Jimmy Eat World Bleed American Bleed American Autolux Future Perfect Plantlife Broadcast The Noise Made By People You Can Fall Nobody Pacific Drift: Western Water Music Vol. 1 Porpoise Song Timtim Let's Pretend We're Going Sideliner The Notwist Shrink Day 7 Of Montreal The Sunlandic Twins Oslo In The Summertime Blur Parklife Girls & Boys Grand Funk Railroad Classic Masters We're An American Band The Kinks The Kink Kronikles Lola
Fri, Jun. 20th, 2008, 12:59 am
bright ideas
i like games like "jake hunter: detective chronicles" (jhdc) for the Nintendo DS. I wish the video game reviewing media at large wouldn't automatically dismiss adventure games like jhdc for having "no gameplay". Admittedly, the game has maybe a bit less gameplay than some.. and it'sa bit short on the polish that can make a game connect universally with different types of players.. but it has a certain charm. it's worth playing for people who enjoy interactive comic books (which i, and a large part of japan (but not the US) do), and it will be ignored by everyone else. hopefully it fills enough of a niche to encourage further releases of the type.... Also, Mac McCaughan is the man.
...without leaving the house. the orange county public library system is one of the best i've had the pleasure of being around, so i'm taking advantage of it. one can use their website to search for and order library books, which will then be delivered right to the door free of charge. i can then use these offerings as i please to learn myself whatever i darn well please. including "ironic" colloqualisms in a faux-journalistic setting. but i digress... first order of business: i want to get back into the more technical aspects of computing that i used to be more well-versed in. to that end, i am downloading ubuntu linux studio -- a package said to be highly compatible with various open source professional audio utilities. this will hopefully get me back to using a command line, doing some scripting, and generally just refamiliarizing with my inner programming geek. computer science as a major/career proved to be a little boring to me in practice, but i do have somewhat of a natural flair for it. dabbling it it could be fun, not to mention useful as another cog in my budding game audio career machine. but now lunch is ready.
Fri, May. 2nd, 2008, 09:58 am
Sega Reunites Xenogears Staff For DS Game
No, you can't have another Xenogears, but Sega will give you the next best thing. This summer, Sega will release World Destruction, a new fantasy RPG for the Nintendo DS created by three key Xenogears alums. yessssssssss!
Wed, Apr. 30th, 2008, 03:35 pm
best spam ever
it's nice how courteous some spammers have become:
hi there
NFL Head Coach to be Bundled with Madden 09I was really looking forward to checking out NFL Head Coach 09. The first version of that game was a great idea conceptually, but extremely lacking when it came to interface and on-the-field play. It wasn't a good game, but I was still hopeful (and even a little excited!) with the announcement of an 09 edition. Madden as a series, on the other hand, has become stale for me lately. Granted I haven't really played the 08 edition much beyond the demo, but 07 also failed to pull me in like most of the previous versions did. With 06 and before, I was a madden fiend; playing multiple seasons in franchise mode with multiple teams. I now find myself ambivalent about another release in the series. Maybe I'm just getting older and gravitating towards football management / simulation games over action football titles.. but suffice to say I have no plans to buy madden '09 at this moment. I am saddened by this announcement, as it seems a shame I won't be able to get head coach '09 separately. A game that I was practically salivating to play on launch day has become one that I won't get to play unless I buy another game I don't want along with it. BOO TO THAT! Unless madden '09 somehow becomes the brilliant next-gen NFL 2K-killer edition we've all been waiting for... ...the notion of paying $90 for a game I'm not interested in just to get NFL head coach '09 is not one that I can justify to myself at this point.
stolen from 1up.com:Brütal LegendPublisher: Sierra Developer: Double Fine Productions Release Date: TBA Also On: PS3, PC
What is it? F'ing metal, is what it is. Tim Schafer (Psychonauts, Grim Fandango)is calling down the gods of metal to assist him in creating afree-roaming brawler about roadie Eddie Riggs (played by Jack Black)who is enlisted to help save humanity through the power of rock. Why should I care? Look for a diabolical mix of action andstrategy, with Eddie commanding hordes of headbangers against those whowould put an end to metal as we know it. Also look for cameos fromLemmy Kilmister, Rob Halford, and Ronnie James Dio. What's the prognosis? Picture two hands making devil horns so hard they're literally shaking. Now picture them thrust into the air in triumph.
Sun, Nov. 25th, 2007, 02:35 pm
worse for a day
people die. it's a very sad truth, but one we must strive to understand.. however impossible that is. for understanding is power. in order to maintain the power balance required to properly nourish a human soul, sad truths cannot run the show. on the other hand, it seems (due to our bi-ped nature? the duality of man? etc.) that once one understands my previous statement, one may feel compelled to oscillate to the other end of the emotional spectrum. this is denial, an unwavering, unconscious thought process that shuts out memories and ideas that need not be shut out. in fact it is their exclusion from normalcy that can cause rifts in our delicate balance as a species. one's thoughts affect the current state of the natural world. i love the intense sound of hard-heeled footsteps across a solid surface. add a little doppler effect, some minor ambiance, a few miniscule reverbs(maybe a vocoder --hah)....and voila! you can create an impassioned soundscape with zest. this one's for ev's grandson, my old friend kalas, and Jungian Psychology.
so i was reading this review on netflix for children of paradise.. it's a "romantic fantasy set in the world of French theatre in the 1830s".. and the reviewer said (emphasis added): Without a doubt, this may be one of the greatest movies ever made.Notice the specific lighting that highlights portions of people'sbodies, eyes, hair, and the sincerity that the acting embodies.Everything is in it for a reason, from the flowers to the moon. And ifyou love the theatre, the backstage sequences will knock your socksoff. There are hundreds of people in a shot at a time, and each one ofthem is doing a specific thing. No movie will be made like this everagain. Choose your friends based on whether they like this film. come on mr OB 1843900, don't you think you're being a bit dramatic? i mean, i was with you til that last line.. if i followed your advice, i probably wouldn't have any friends! .....or does he mean i should get more friends?
Sun, Aug. 12th, 2007, 04:30 pm
WHY i love everything
anyone want a copy of the (apparently) award-winning film i worked on? i am credited for 'audio post' on the film the lonely lights, the color of lemons. apparently it won the award for "best experimental film" at SXSW. i did not know this until brad pointed it out to me in a myspace comment. since then i've dug my copy of it out of our spare bedroom, and i've just finished re-watching it. i used a crappy old TV with no special capabilities for sound, and i must say i still rather liked it. there's only one scene that i remember doing some foley for that i particularly enjoyed that didn't make it into the final cut of the film. otherwise i feel directly responsible for at least a few of the cool bits of sound editing in it, so it might be time to finally finish this thing up to my liking (along with some other projects i've done) into a respectable sound-demo-reel. as a start to that, i'd be happy to send a copy of this to anyone interested. just send yr mailing address to futon at chartermi dot net. i'll gladly hook you up with a copy of the DVD via postal mail.
spoon said it right when they wrote "everything hits at once". or maybe i should credit wendy's for ripping off "when it rains, it pours". either way, this month is full of insanity for me. my baby boy michael is due any week now, i'm getting married on the 25th, and i may be getting a new job in ft lauderdale any day now. failing ft. lauderdale, i have reason to think i may be hired for a similar job somewhere similar in the near future. i'm finally getting the house set up so i can enjoy both a baby crib and a home recording/editing studio.... my wife-to-be is an amazing person who loves me unconditionally, i have great friends all around me... what more could a man ask for??
the goddess is surely smiling upon me. =)
my lovely wife (to be) was googling my name for fun tonight.. and among the hits on myspace comments and scad radio mentions, i found out i'm isted on IMDB. How about that shit?
oi. just finished mowing the neigbour's lawn... not normally an event worth noting, but it is the first time i've had good relations with a neighbour in quite some time.. she is a nice old lady (with a stone georgia bulldog in her yard urinating on nothing in particular) that owns a lawnmower.. we are young college-agey kids who have no lawnmower. so i offered to mow both our lawns. everything was going smoothly until the cord kept comng unplugged every time i would turn around.... electric mowers be damned!! after i realized just how unwieldly having daisy-chained power extension cords tailing you around a yard that's full of landscaping.. well, let's just say THAT wasn't a 2 hours i'd like to repeat. and just think.. tomorrow i get to mow our lawn too! joy on a sitck! anyway, i've been doing pretty well musically these days. this was the real point i wanted to get down here. i've been leading the savannah barnes & noble music dept for about 3 months now, and it's really been a pretty decent time. which is rather surprising since it's retail and all, y'know. but besides a few melodramatic moments with a big-boss or two, i've had some nice co-worker cameraderie, learned alot about new music and what the coffee shop crowd is into, and had a broader exposure to any music i'd care to invest in than i've had since my college radio days. i even bought a copy of the reissue/expansion of sebadoh's III for ~$12. can't argue with that price for a 2 disc'er. CDs are still way too god-damned expensive for the most part though. even with a 20% employee discount. i refuse to pay $16 for CDs like mary timony, enon, or other indie-ish artists i couyld actually get in. i just don't believe that anyone besides b&n is collecting on that extra windfall. i refuse to support higher prices for higher prices sake.... though i did special order a copy of ken andrews' secrets of the lost satellite record to put up as a "STAFF RECOMMENDATION". muhahah. but i digress. i've been getting my collection back up to snuff a bit since the ol' purge of '04. (hard drive crash) so much so that i made a mix cd for andy-- the first i've put real effort into in almost a year. it feels good. and now, the tracklist: 01 Apples In Stereo - Vocoder Ba Ba 02 Refused - New Noise 03 McLusky - Lightsabre Cocksucking Blues 04 Helmet - Unsung 05 Smashing Pumpkins - Tarantula 06 beavis & butthead clip (remember that time we partied with anthrax?) 07 Dinosaur Jr. - Almost Ready 08 DVDA - Now You're a Man 09 Nada Surf - The Plan 10 Black Heart Procession - Not Just Words 11 My Morning Jacket - It Beats 4 U 12 Parry Gripp - One Donut A Day (and everything's gonna be ok) 13 Matt Pond PA - Neighbor's New Yard 14 Dismemberment Plan - The Ice of Boston 15 TV On The Radio - Staring At The Sun 16 RJD2 - Smoke and Mirrors 17 My Recrding class in orlando (ARTI1492) - Rainbow Techno 18 Boom Bip - Roads Must Roll 19 Louis Armstrong - A Kiss To Build A Dream On 20 AIR - Left Bank 21 Soft Pink Truth - Gender Studies 22 Neuroticfish - They're Coming To Take Me Away 23 Safety Scissors - After Disaster 24 Vitalic - Poney Part I >>SECRET TRACK<< Supernova - Chewbacca it basically plays like a greatest hits of what i've been listening to for the past few years. i was going to say more, but now i'm tired. i'm going to take a shower and play Shady O'grady's Rising Star. that's right, a rock star RPG.
Your fax message was sent to: Senator Saxby Chambliss (R-GA)
Senator Johnny Isakson (R-GA)
Representative John Barrow (D-GA 12th)Subject: Don't Let Internet Radio Be Crushed As a fan of Internet radio, I was alarmed to learn that the Copyright Royalty Board has decided to raise music royalty rates by 300 to 1200 percent. For most webcasters the new royalties exceed their revenue and they simply will go bankrupt and stop webcasting. The silencing of Internet radio would be a blow to listeners like me who enjoy the wide variety of choices only available via Internet radio. This will kill the great diversity of music that I hear over the Internet and all the independent artists who have a difficult time breaking through on other forms of radio. I respectfully request that Congress look into this matter and take action to prevent it. Please understand that time is of the essence since the new royalty rates are retroactive to January 1, 2006 so they will cause immediate bankruptcies if they become effective for even one day. Please don’t let the music die. Sincerely, Carl Brich http://capwiz.com/saveinternetradio/issues/alert/?alertid=9631541
worry about the beginning and the end, and the middle will take care of itself.
stange memories on this nervous night... has it been 5 years? 6? it seems like a lifetime. the kind of peak that never comes again. it's a very special time to be a part of.. but no explanation-- no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that that corner of time in the world... whatever it meant.
so this morning i woke up in savannah again somehow. then i remembered that i've been here for a couple weeks already now! hot damn. i have next to nothing to do, which is not really so bad. i play alot of games and listen to alot of music while i wait for a potential employer to realize how utterly indispensible i would no-doubt be to their budding enterprise.. y'know, all those mall retail outlets could really use a boost. wait, what the hell am i babbling about? in any case, i hope to fnd a job here that will suck only half-a-phallus or so. and then we'll try to move in the direction of sucking less and less incrementally with each successive job. of course, that should be any good capitalist's goal, but i'm starting over again, and this time in a small town at that. such scenarios have nasty habits of limiting one's opprtunities. but you know, i kind of like my life this way. i'm constantly being presented with fresh avenues for moving on to something new.. fresh starts all around, if you will. it gets my blood going. obviously, i would prefer there to be more audio related jobs in savannah for me to choose from (read: ANY AT ALL), but at this point i'll be jumping on the first thing that offers pay. plus, i know i can get a job with the same company i was working for in orlando in most of the larger cities around the country.. so once i inevitably move on from savannah, i'll have a ready-made jumping off point in case i haven't found anything better during this time. anyway, i read my livejournal friends list almost as much as i read my email, so i figured i might start contributing to the community again. though there really isn't much of a community left it seems, but that's ok. the main reason i'm doing this is so i have somewhere convenient to write down some thoughts, and maybe bounce them off a person or two in the process. or at least me. years ago i used the Semagic client, and it doesn't appear to have changed much. i like it. i read that there is a chnace there may be a new (sadly direct-to-video) GREMLINS sequel. despite the low-budget-status that such a project would no doubt be relegated to, i must admit i'm foaming at the mouth at the prospect. (cue laugh track) actually, i even wrote a little treatment fora gremlins 3 a few years back, but of course that was just whimsy. in any case, i'd be happy if it was better than the starship troopers sequel at least. i wish i had a radio show to go do.
so i'm working this job with a couple union guys, i offered one of them a mint from the package i picked up from the 'free swag' pile from earlier in the convention. the guy responds "no, i'm not trying to win friends and influence people," with a snarl.
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